Thursday, December 27, 2012

Desperation Drawing

I think I might be fighting depression, but am not sure, as that is not a natural state for me. I just know that I would be happy to just sleep all day until my hand/wrist gets better. I like to think I can will myself better, but it is not happening. I am being good about doing the exercises that have been prescribed by the OT people and am seeing some improvement, but I want to be my old self with complete use of my right hand right now! and that is not happening.

Instead of giving in to the urge to just go to bed, I decided to do a bit of sketching. There was a couple of cardinals out in the snow so I did a quick sketch and then added a bit of color. I used my Neocolor IIs and didn't have the colors I really wanted, but these will do. I think you would know they were cardinals even if I hadn't told you so.

And then I decided to try my hand at a couple of faces from fashion magazines.

Then I tried to sketch a variety of scenes from photos I've been saving for just that purpose.

That is a house on the left and a deer on the right.

And finally I tried a rooster and a street scene.

I think it is time to get out pastels and try my hand at a small piece of art. I'll probably start with a still life as that is my favorite kind of painting to try.

What about you? How are you doing? I've been faithfully reading your blogs, but haven't felt too much like responding, but I am really enjoying your art.



  1. Sorry to hear about how you've been feeling, and hope that the drawings help to bring you up. I've had my own moments lately - some tough events this year and the aftermath, and I can relate to your comment that it does not feel like a natural state. But the more it happens, the more natural it seems. But you are doing it right, getting out of bed, doing - then it is harder to succumb, I am sure. It's a hard period, but my feeling is that it feels like a long time, but looking back a year after it's over it won't feel so long. Does that help? Love the cardinals - and yes - I knew them right off the bat!

  2. I'm very familiar with depression and how debilitating it can be. Art and exercise are good ways for coping with it and there you are - doing them both! This will pass, my friend, I promise. Yep - I knew right away they were cardinals, and the faces (especially the woman) are wonderful.

  3. Vicki! That is exactly, how I feel. Every day is a struggle. Before, I got up felt great went for a walk.
    Sometimes now, I am afraid to go walk. I would love to walk anytime I felt like it. However, I am still stiff. There is one thing to be stiff- but I stretch everyday. I would spin like a Ballerina every morning! Less than six months ago. Even then I knew something was wrong. So, Yes, it is depression. I am so sorry you are having to go through this pain. I feel better today. However, to go and down the stairs I use braces. No, doctor will send me to a specialist to check why I have to wear a brace to walk when six months ago I did not. Sometimes, I wear them on both knees. So, keep working. Hopefully, Your exercises and positive attitude will help. I have been reading Dan Brown's book on "The Lost Symbol". It discusses, Noetic Sciences- " Mind of Matter" . How the body and the mind are the first line to better health. My mental state does seem better. I am thinking about getting those foot wraps to walk around in the house that support the arch of the foot. I feel the doctors are responsible for my illness - giving me medicine that made me sick.
    I do know how difficult it is - even with small children the healing of sprains and broken bones.
    I love the drawings, Especially, those birds. I do not think I have seen a Red Bird or Blue Jay or Mocking Bird in a long time. I keep you in my prayers. My His Healing Angels come to you and Heal You in mind, body and Spirit. Circle of Loving Prayers.

  4. If this depression lasts longer than a few weeks, get yourself to Dr. pronto. There are good meds to help relieve it and they can be a lifesaver. (Speaking from personal experience.) You don't have to stay on them forever, just to get you over the worst of it. I do understand how debilitating it can be, certainly not a good feeling to be out of sorts and not like yourself.

  5. If this depression lasts longer than a couple of weeks, get yourself to the Dr. pronto...meds are available to help you get over the worst of it. You don't have to take them forever, just to elevate your mood. I understand how debilitating depression can be, I speak from experience here. Healing takes time and patience. Picture yourself well and active. Sending postive thoughts your way.


  6. I am not familiar with depression, but I know from my wife is that you simply don't feel like doing anything and just want to stay in bed all the time because there's nothing 'meaningful' for you to be 'doing'. I am sure it's not great to feel that way, and I surely hope that your wrist feels better soon.
    These sketches are lovely, and if sketching makes you feel happy, keep doing and keep posting. I know you love taking pictures too, that's something fun I am sure. Hope you feel better soon Vicki, and I wish you a Happy New Year